


The Ones Left Behind

by KamisamaButler



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Alternative Universe - Fire Emblem Fates: Conquest, Cannon Divergence, F/M, Fire Emblem Fates: Conquest Spoilers, Kamui is dead
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-14
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-10-31 14:49:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10901583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KamisamaButler/pseuds/KamisamaButler
Summary: Xander had the misfortune of having to witness Prince Ryoma end the life of his beloved little princess. After his confrontation with Ryoma, Xander must learn how to pick up the pieces that Kamui left behind in order to restore peace.





	1. Words Never Spoken

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first fan fiction I have ever written, so please be kind to me ;-; Of course my first fan fiction also has to be a rather sad one (in my opinion anyways). Currently I have no solid outline for the story, but I do expect it to be at least a few chapters long, so that Xander's emotional process during this situation can be fleshed out some. This work is not beta'd, so please excuse any misspellings or grammatical errors at the moment, I will try to fix them at a later date. Anyways, as this is my first work, I am still trying to figure out my writing style. So, any type of constructive criticism is greatly appreciated!

_KAMUI!!!_

Xander felt bile begin to rise up. His vision became completely hazy, save for the burning image of his wife's limp body hanging from the blade of Ryoma's sword. They were too late, they took too long to save her, and now she was gone from the world. Gone from _him_. Her smile would be no more, and it was his fault for not saving her in time.

With a new found rage, Xander charged forward towards Ryoma with Siegfried in hand. He was not entirely what took place in his rage, but soon enough he had Ryoma pinned to the ground underneath his sword. There was nowhere for this bastard to go. Xander felt someone call to him right before he pulled Siegfried for the final blow. He knew that voice. It was a voice he could never forget, but at this moment he did not want to hear what it had to say, because it was telling him to not bloody his hands with her brother's blood. This entire war she told the entire army to spare as many lives as possible. To fight without killing, which, honestly is far easier said than done. But the army followed her order and made it this far with quite the minuscule death toll on their hands. Of course, none of this mattered to the high prince of Hoshido. No, his honor was too great a thing to even begin to fathom the sacrifices and the struggles his beloved Kamui had gone through to try and bring peace to the two kingdoms. And, now it is this same selfish prince that his little princess was telling him not to kill.

Noticing the pause in Xander's motion, Ryoma yelled at him to finish what he started, to be the man he claimed to be and see his battle through. This threw Xander over the edge, leaving him livid with a new found rage. He looked Ryoma squarely in the eyes and began to yell at him in a voice that was so hoarse with fatigue and despair that it almost came out as a whisper. "Why!? Why her!? All she ever wanted to do was bring peace to both our kingdoms. This whole war she has been telling us not to kill any Hoshidan we may cross swords with, because she wanted to leave open the possibility for a peaceful future between the two kingdoms! What? Did you really think she would ever kill anyone she considered family? Did you really believe she would kill Sakura, Hinoka or Takumi? Because if you did, then you never truly knew the woman whom you called your sister! She....she...Sakura is safe within our personal camp as a prisoner. Kamui saw to it that she has been fed, and that my father did not know of her capture. She had Hinoka give us her spear as a way to prove her death to my father, all the while sending Hinoka off into hiding. Takumi is the only one whom we do not know what happened to, but whatever his fate, it was not by any of our blades. No, instead, Kamui spent nearly an entire day looking for Takumi after watching him jump to his presumed death". At this point, Xander began to become completely overcome with grief. He wanted nothing more than to end the life of his wife's killer, but he knew that was not what she wanted, so instead he stood there, sword beginning to shake as he watched Ryoma's face for any possible reaction to the info that he had just shared.

"That...that cannot be true. You are...surely you must be lying". Ryoma's eyes began to widen upon listening to Xander's explanation of what had transpired between his siblings and his sister whom had abandoned her birth country, or, at least that is what he had thought took place. Now he was not so sure.

"Why...why would I ever lie about something such as this?" Xander's voice was nothing but a whisper now, tears beginning to break free from his eyes, making his already hazy vision blurry with tears. "She was the better of all of us, and would have done anything to see all of her siblings safe, and that extended to you as well". Dropping Siegfried at this point, Xander fell to his knees to pick up his little princess and hold her close. As he did, he whispered his apologies for not keeping her safe. For failing to follow through with his promise he gave her on their wedding day. Xander took one last look at his wife's now glazed over eyes before closing them forever. Upon doing this he looked back up at Ryoma with a new found hatred in his eyes and voice.

“You know, they say that us Nohrians kill people just for the fun of it. That we are a people of darkness who only know how to kill and to conquer. However, I have come to believe that it is the Hoshidans who truly are awarded this honor. Yes, my father may have killed people endlessly, but so have you. While my _wife_ , the future queen of Nohr, fought with the vision of peace, and within that vision, she sparred more lives than you and my father combined ever did. A kingdom with a queen like that surely could not have been as evil as you Hoshidans seem to make it out to be." Standing up with Kamui in his arms, Xander looked at Ryoma one last time, "In honor of my now late wife, I will follow her legacy and spare you your life, I will take you into custody so that my father may not harm you until this war is over, but know this. The only reason why my blade is not in you at this very moment is because Kamui would have been beyond consoling if I had ended your life". After saying this, Xander turned around and began to walk away. As he did, he heard Ryoma let out a loud cry of despair followed by the sound of a blade entering into a body. Part of Xander was glad at this. He was glad that the killer of his beloved little princess was now dead as well. However, part of him was angry that her killer took the easy way out, instead of having to deal with the misery and consequences that his choice had created.

\--------

After leaving Kamui with a distraught Elise, Xander returned to the battle finishing up what his wife, what _they_  , had started. He had made a silent oath to his beloved little princess that he would see her plans through. That he would have his father sit upon the throne in Hoshido, and have the truth of his nature be shown. Although, he was not entirely sure what this truth was, he knew that his father had indeed changed, and at this point, he trusted his little princess far more than anyone else. So, whatever the truth was, he was going to see it through. If not for his kingdom, than for her.


	2. The Darkest Moment is Always Right Before Dawn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry if I ended up killing off any of your favorite characters, but as much as I love to keep everyone alive in my playthrough, I always feel that in real battles at least some of the named characters would not be able to survive. Though, to be fair, I think I still kept the death to a rather small and unrealistic few....Also, I personally always felt the extreme time difference between the regular world and the Deep Realms was quite a stretch. So, for the purpose of this story, I left the Deep Realms as a place where time does move along more quickly, but not to such an extent to where you have young adults the same age as their parents in a matter of days/weeks. Therefore, while the kids are all born, they are also too young to help with the fighting. Also, inspirational speeches are hard to write...Finally, thank you for all of the kudos from the first chapter! I really was not sure if anyone would actually enjoy my haphazard writing style ;-;
> 
> Edit: Note to self, don't write stuff and then post it when under the influence of no sleep. Otherwise you do things like call Xander's sword by his son's name. Went back and just fixed it, and sorry for anyone who had to witness it...

If losing his beloved little princess was not enough of a shock, looking at the monster that had replaced his father definitely was. Xander felt as if his entire world had decided to just crumble beneath him, only an aching dread of what was to come was left within his hollow shell. However, a part of him still knew that everything would be in vain if he just gave up now, so he slowly drew Siegfried from its sheath and prepared himself for the final battle as he stumbled forward.

“Milord, I know what I am about to say may be out of line, but please do remember you are not alone in this. We all cared deeply for Lady Kamui, and want to see her mission through to completion. I swear on my oath to you as your retainer that I will see this mission through to the end, so long as I live”. Laslow said as he walked up to Xander, putting a hand on his shoulder as if trying to help lend his support to stop the shaking hands of his lord.

“He is right, brother. Everyone here cared deeply for Kamui. She truly had quite the gift in forming unbreakable bonds with everyone in this army. Even Niles ended up falling for her, and that in itself is a feat no one thought anyone capable of doing. So, if she was able to do that, I am sure we can see her vision come to fruition”. Leo replied as he walked up the opposite side of his brother.

Giving a crooked smile, Niles sauntered up to the others as he prepared his bow, “Tis true milord, as much as it pains me to admit to having any sort of soft spot, I do find the idea of avenging the little lady quite appealing. At this, Leo rolled his eyes and asked his brother to please excuse the offhanded remark of his retainer, all the while Odin started to loudly state that Niles has plenty of soft spots when it came to his daughter and wife. Soon enough the once grim situation they all found themselves in became a rather lively banter between Odin and Niles.

Camilla breaking through the two rowdy retainers of her younger brother chimed in her opinion of the situation, “What I think they mean to say, dear, is that all of us here are going to help you finish our cute little Kamui's plan. You have our full support”.

Each word of encouragement about Kamui from his close friends and family helped build a new foundation for Xander to stand on. While his grounding still seemed hollow, Xander realized that he was not alone, not yet. And, that he would be able to see Kamui's final wish come true, or, at least he would die trying. Xander climbed atop his steed and looked out to the familiar faces that all showed a new found determination. Clearing his throat, he began to shout out so that all of his friend who formed his army could hear. “Everyone, I have never been good with the whole inspirational speech thing, that was always Kamui's gift. So, I will keep this short. Today we fight not as a future king and his army, but as brothers and sisters in arms bound by the same bond of friendship and camaraderie that Kamui built for us during her time here. It is through this bond that we _will_ be victorious, and that we _will_ bring peace to our beloved homeland, for if not us, who will. Therefore, in order to fulfill the wish of our fallen friend, and protect our friends and families back home, I ask that you raise your weapon one last time, and help me take down this evil plaguing our nation”. Drawing Siegfried out from its sheath, Xander raised his sword high in the air and shouted one last time before the battle started, “For Nohr! And, for those whom we hold dear to our hearts!”. Before Xander could say anything else, everyone raised their weapons in the air and shouted in unison, “For Kamui!”. Trying to hide the fresh tears welling up in his eyes, Xander turned to face his father's impostor, and called for the charge.

 -----------

The battle against his father's impostor was definitely the toughest one any of them had ever fought, and it did not end without many causalities being added to the list. Many foot soldiers lost their lives during the battle, as well as Beruka and Benny. Both Gunter and Azura were presumed dead as well, however, neither of their bodies were ever found. This left Laslow broken with despair similar to that of Xander's, as he too had now lost his wife to this gods forsaken war. While Xander was still dealing with the loss of his little princess, he was still able to offer some solace for his friend who had just found himself in the same situation. Everyone involved was also able to find some relief in the realization that their battle had finally come to an end, and that they were in fact victorious. Now, it was up to them to pick up the pieces left behind by those who left before them. However, no one was exactly sure how those pieces were supposed to fit together.

Walking the battlefield one last time before heading home, Xander offered a silent prayer to Kamui, letting her know about the victory they were able to achieve, as well as giving her a new oath. “I swear to you my little princess, I will bring a new found prosperity to our beloved kingdom. I will also do all that is within my power to make sure your homeland of Hoshido is also well taken care of, and try my hardest to make sure that peace will reign between the two nations. While it will be difficult alone, I will also make sure that our sons are raised to take on your positive outlook on life, and that they will grow into fine young men you would be proud of. This I swear to you, and it shall be my new oath that I will not fail to keep”. After offering a few more silent words to his beloved, Xander turned around and left the gods forsaken place to start his return trip home.


	3. Chapter 3

“Papa!”, Kana yelled as he ran down the corridor after seeing his father through the window. “Siegbert! Hurry! Papa and Mama are back!”.

“Yes, Kana, I can see that, but we need to make sure to stay calm. Mama and Papa have been on a long trip, so they are probably really tired”, Siegbert responded. However, as much as Siegbert was trying his best to act in accordance to what is expected of a crown prince, he still had trouble maintaining his excitement, as he had quite the large smile on his face. “Say, why don't we go meet them at the gate, and give them a big welcome home hug?”. Siegbert tried to finish saying before Kana was already running towards the door saying something about it being a race.

Chasing after Kana was not rather difficult for Siegbert, as Kana's five year old legs could not really compete with his longer seven year old ones just yet. After catching up to Kana, Kana still wanted to treat the whole ordeal as a race, so Siegbert entertained his younger brother. However, he made sure that he still beat his younger brother, because even in play, as the crown prince of Nohr, he needed to make sure he was not bested so easily.

Due to their race, Kana and Siegbert found themselves at the gate rather quickly, which just made Kana even more impatient. It did not take them too long, however, to realize that something was not right as their parent's army came closer into view. Siegbert needed only one look at his father's face to notice something was wrong, and the fact that his mother was not next to his father left a sickening feeling in his stomach.

“Welcome home, Father. Is Mother not back yet?” Siegbert asked his father as Xander rode closer into view. However, he instantly regretted asking the question about his mother, because the face his father made let him know that something was not right. The answer he was to receive was also something he would wish he never would have had to hear.

During the entire trip home, Xander was preparing how he would tell his two sons about what had happened to their mother. He had thought he prepared himself as much as he could have, but an entirely new level of anxiety began to surface upon seeing his two sons at the gate. He realized then that he would never have been ready to tell them what had happened to their mother, but he also realized that they deserved to know. Granted, he would leave out some of the details until they were older. Realizing that it was time to tell his sons, he called Peri over to take care of the rest of the army, and help them get settled in. Usually he would have asked Laslow to do this, but he realized that he would have to prepare his own similar conversation to have with his own to children back at home.

Losing Kamui was the hardest thing Xander had ever had to go through. However, he found that telling his two young sons that their mother was no longer with them was definitely the second hardest thing he has ever had to do. Steeling himself, Xander tried to speak in a calm, but comforting voice to his young sons, “Siegbert, Kana, there is something I need to tell the both of you. Let's head to your study, and I will speak there”. The two boys noticing that their father had something important to say, quietly followed him to their study.

\--------

Siegbert instantly understood what his father was saying, and broke down into tears right away. Xander had to explain the situation a little more to Kana about what it meant that he would never be able to see is mother again, but it was not long before understanding overtook Kana as well, and he too began to cry. Xander quickly embraced his two sons, and spoke in a voice that was almost a cry, “Your mother may not be with us anymore, but know that she loves you both dearly, even if she is no longer in this realm. Wherever she may be at this moment, I know that she is watching over all of us, and making sure to keep us all safe”. At this point Xander was unable to keep his voice steady anymore, so instead, he hugged his two sons closer, and began to cry silently with them.

They stayed this way until well into the night, and then finally Kana fell asleep with Siegbert falling suit soon after. Xander carried each child to their bed one at a time, and then went to close the door when Kana, who had woken up called out to his father, "Papa, I can't sleep. Please stay”. Xander closed the door and went to hug his son. Climbing into Kana's bed, he silently hoped that rest would finally great them. Siegbert, also having trouble falling asleep, walked over to Kana's now crowded bed. After a little bit of awkward shuffling, he was able to find some room to squeeze in. Once they were all settled in, they were able to finally find some rest.


	4. Evanesce

“So, you are telling me that Laslow just _vanished”_ , Xander said as he abruptly got up from his desk full of paperwork.

“Y-yes, Milord. We have looked everywhere, but he cannot be found. In fact, it seems the only thing of his that he left behind are his two children, M-milord”, the young servant responded nervously.

Upon hearing the last bit of news, Xander slammed his fist onto his desk. “Does he truly think that the loss of his wife is reason enough to shirk his duties!? To leave his children behind!? Gods! I lost my wife in that war as well, and you don't see me stopping my duties!”.

Xander paused in his speech when he noticed that the servant was beginning to tremble. Not wanting to instill fear into his people like his father had done before him, he excused the servant back to their other duties, and then began to pace around his study. It is not like he did not understand Laslow during this time. During these last few weeks since their return he has found it extremely hard to adjust to his new life as king and as a single father. The later turning out to be far more difficult than he could even imagine. Not because his children will difficult, far from it. In fact, Siegbert and his sense of duty and honor ended up having him take on an even larger role in helping keep his brother, Kana, out of trouble. No, what was really the hardest thing about raising the two alone was that their appearance was a clear reminder of their mother, especially in regards to Kana. Siegbert had taken on his mother's silver hair color, but Kana had taken on an appearance that was uncannily similar to that of his mother. The only thing that really looked different between the two was the blonde hair Kana had received from him. While looking at his sons did cause Xander to remember that his beloved little princess was no longer with them, it also reminded him of their love. And, that this love was able to manifest into two precious young lives that he was able to call his sons. So, he'll be damned if the reason why Laslow left his two children behind was because of their resemblance to their mother!

Xander took a deep breath to try and calm down while he pinched his brows together with his hand. He would like to think that he knew his retainer pretty well. And, that meant he knew that his retainer probably had good reason for not actually taking his children with him, wherever it is that he went. He also realized that it should not really be all that surprising that he vanished, as Laslow seemed to have come from out of nowhere demanding to be his retainer to begin with. Unfortunately he did not have the time to spend looking into exactly what happened to his friend, but he did know that his friend's disappearance was of his own choice, or he would have left more of his belongings behind. What he did need to figure out was what to do with his friend's two children. Xander himself already had his hands full with rebuilding Nohr, and his own two sons. He did not feel he would be able to properly raise two more children on top of that. However, Xander realized that he owed it to his friend to make sure that his children did not end up in an orphanage. For now, Xander would just make sure that they had a place to stay within the castle until he was able to find a more suitable care taker for them.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I based this chapter around the afterward for Laslow and Azura at the end of the game when they are married. I noticed that while their children are still in the realm with everyone else, both Azura and Laslow are said to disappear, so...yeah, that is where I got the idea. Also, please forgive me if I end up mixing the Japanese names with the English ones for characters. I originally played the game in Japanese, and then played them again in English, so I am always mixing up their names.


End file.
